Warcraft III......

What are you, my seratonin?

Ok, I was wrong about the name. There is a huge mall somewhere within driving distance of Virgina Beach/Richmond though, I'm sure of it. Maybe it's in DC, I'm not sure anymore.

I don't know nuffin bout no Myrtle Beach, miz Scahlet. I have family in Virginia Beach and went I went to visit them, they took me to Virginia Beach.

So harsh. But... I'm not gonna argue, though I think your scale might be thrown off due to the influx of high-quality porn.

 

It could also be his good looking wife...wait, what am I saying? This is ThreeDogs we're talking about. It's gotta be the porn thing, or a weak beer thing not giving you strong enough goggles.

 

Funny thing about beer goggles, there has been a minor human interest news item shown a bit this week about a study done by a Scottish uni regarding the effect of beer on our visual estimation of faces. They found it only takes a couple of beers for most people's standards to slip significantly.

 

One of our lawn equipment dealers is in Myrtle Beach. BEEEEaUUUtiful. Oh yeah, and you don neeed no steenkeen beer goggles at Myrtle Beach.

Of course, none of them rate on the same level as my wife. Said for Sheriff Fatman's benefit. I've paid you enough money.

 

Would that be because you are young and desperately in love with her¹, or because she's looking over your shoulder as you write this (or performing equivalent monitoring activity)?






¹She's looking over your should as you write this (or performing equivalent monitoring activity).

 

I seriously doubt she knows about all this, but you can never be too careful..... My wife has a wicked right jab.

 

Right jab? Does that mean she's one of those left-handed freaks I keep hearing about these days? Everyone knows lefties are the tools of the Devil, because since most people are right-handed, God must be too, and the Devil is the opposite of God, so he is left-handed. Therefore I must conclude your wife is either the Devil of one of his tools.

How do you know of her wicked right jab? Does she beat you up a lot? Do you beat her? Do you have friendly beating on each other matches? Not so friendly beating on each other matches?

 

Dude, fuck you. Rocky Balboa was a southpaw.

 

Bullshit he was a southpaw...Rambo wasn't left-handed was he? In any case, Sylvester Stallone was both men, and Rambo had a big friggin' gun, therefore it's a moot point, because everyone knows that right-handers (God's holiest of warriors) have superior weaponry (i.e. ranged) compared to Satan's most evil of warriors (left-handers) who only have poxy hand-to-hand techniques, which they aren't even good at.

 

Ehhrrrrmmm.....No, my wife is right handed. I meant, right hook. I don't know nothing about boxing.

 

Rocky WAS a southpaw. The Mick even explained to Rocky that that's why guys didn't want to fight him; Because fighting a southpaw was akward and made them look bad.

The fact that Sylvester Stallone played both a retarded left-handed boxer and a freedom-loving, POW rescuing, red headband wearing, right-handed commando just speaks to his awesome range as an actor, not whether or not Rocky was a lefty.

EDIT - This thread was about Warcraft III?!

 

Apparently so, Milo, apparently so...

Anyway, I disagree. Anyone can 'fight' as a soutpaw for the cameras. Hell, I could fight southpaw if I wanted to, I'd get my arse kicked eventually, but you know, if there was a camera there, then I could make it look like I was a natural southpaw boxer. Simply because I have as much acting talent as Stallone, which is to say very little to none at all. Look, here's my impression...

*stumbling around in a boxing ring of crowded people...*
"Adrian! Adriaan! ADRIAAAN!!!"

I should have been Rocky.

 

Here's my impression of Rocky:

*pummels on Jarinor as though he was a side of beef, southpaw style*

Besides, there are some advantages to fighting southpaw even if you're a righty. Bruce Lee advocated having your power in front rather than behind. And he could kick both our asses with both hands tied behind his back, balancing on his head.

And Stallone isn't that bad of an actor. He was good in the first Rocky and the first Rambo. He was alright in Tango and Cash. And he turned out an Oscar-worthy performance in Cobra.

 

C-o-br-a? I'm afraid I don't know what you're talking about...

 

Make that your first DVD, then.¹

I kinda liked Sly in his mid-90s stuff. The Specialist, and Judge Dread were pretty good. Demolition Man and Assassins were excellent. I even liked one of his 80s movies, Lock Up.













¹Please don't.

 

Cobra

Tagline: Crime is the disease. Meet the cure.

Oh Fah-kyess! Vintage 80's badass, right there. One of my favorite scenes in the whole movie:

A crazed, vaguely ethnic terrorist is holding a grocery store hostage. The police call in... The Cobra. This is where the law stops and Cobra starts.
Terrorist: Get back, man! I got a bomb! I'll blow this whole place up!
Cobra: *shifts toothpick from left corner of mouth to right* Go ahead. I don't shop here.

EDIT

That was a pretty good movie. I watched it a million times when my buddy had free pay-per-view. Antonio Banderas had this one line in that movie that cracked me up. That guy can not cuss effectively. He sounds like such a pussy when he does it with that accent. It was the scene when he was in the bathtub talking to his boss or whatever on his laptop. He gets some news like "Sly is still alive" or something to that effect. And then comes the line...

He slaps the bath water all girly like as he yells "FAK FAKFAKFAK SHEET". God... If Assassins was a 6 or 7 before, that one line alone made it at least an 8.

 

Okay, so Assassins is good. Sheriff, most of the Stallone movies you mentioned I heard were really crap overall, unless you were looking for mindless action, in which case they were great. I don't mind mindless action sometimes, so I might rent them...

Looks like I'll have to get Cobra, if it has a line like that in it...

 

Sheriff Fatman, you actually liked Judge Dredd?
I mean, they took one great comic book character, whose stories were an amazing Anarchist manifest (1) and subverted it to another stupid action movie with all the traditional clichés and messages. “Humanize Dredd�? What the hell? The whole point of the character is the he has no human emotion, being the perfect embodiment of law enforcement. In the movie he becomes just the typical action hero, and the story the typical action cliché.
I have to admit that I loved the visual, Mega City does come to life; but that’s it.
(1)disregarding, of course, anything written by the brain dead Garth Ennis

 

I reckon we must be reading 2000AD in different ways. I can see it certainly has strong political commentary, but I always thought it was quite humanist to. Dredd always seemed like a bit of a lonely and sad character to me, a slave to his principles.

I liked the film. I don't think it really stuck to the comic version, but then I don't think it had to. It was in a different medium and format and aimed at a different audience. The comic strip was relatively short, punchy anecdotes which essentially re-iterated the same darkly humourous attitude every episode. I don't know if that would have been made to stretch to film length without adding some new dimension. It would have been great if they could have, but I was content with a crappy action film that captured the seediness of MegaCity4 and the invincibility of Dredd.

It's rare for me to dislike something for not being true to the things its based on. I can see that a select few of my favourite stories would have me jumping up and down if Hollywood departed from them, none of them have been made into films.

Jar, In Demolition Man I liked the setting and Wesley Snipes and thought Sly did his bit. The Specialist was okay, not great. Lock up was a prison movie, and I always like them (maybe it's something about beating the draconian authorities) - Brubaker and Cool Hand Luke are two of my favourite movies.

Actually, I missed one of Sly's from that period. I liked Copland, too. I enjoy seeing people triumph over oppression.

 

Maybe. I have never saw Dredd as a lonely and sad character. Like I said, to me he was the embodiment of a perfect law system. No human weakness interfered in his judgment; compare his actions with Anderson’s. In the “dead man walking� he had a small conscious crisis, due to the fact that he was beginning to feel uncomfortable with the fact that he never questioned anything and also that he was being replaced like an old machine. The Dredd-Kraven-Death parallel is set up with the relations between passion and law-enforcement. Of the three Dredd is the only one who doesn’t even feel passion for his work, that’s why he doesn’t promote a total massacre; his lack of passion forbids him to even imagine laws different from what’s in his book, like Death did.
We never see Dredd’s face. He isn’t human, he applies the Law, just that. Forget the arguments about how the system doesn’t work due to human weakness, that power corrupts etc. That’s not the root of injustice; MegaCity’s symbol hasn’t any weakness. The Justice System works: that’s the source of injustice. The stories are humanist, Dredd isn’t.
But one thing I completely agree with you: Mega City (isn’t it 1?) is beautiful! It really comes alive on the screen.

Normally it also doesn’t bother me. In other thread I said how much I liked Starship Troopers. The film is the opposite of the book. Heimlein wrote a deep and thoughtful proto-fascist work. Verhovoen and Neumier twisted it to make an acid social criticism. My problem with Dredd is that they took an unusual and overall thoughtful work and transformed it in a cheap and common action movie.