The quest for the Scroll of Forum Resurrection

"Is that my axe....it is my axe"
I grab my axe and then I stand up.After that I try to run but I am too dizzy.
"I just came to this town from the whell clan and I have never seen any of your kind and now I know all of you are dumbass bastards!!!!!!"

 

The dwarf sounded sincere - sincerely fed up of having his head bashed, if nothing else. He had an honest face, with a slack-jawed simple expression that could well mean his was just down from the hills. Then again, it could just mean he was concussed.

Before someone else had a chance to bop him on the head, I stepped in front of the stocky fellow.

"Now, now lads - let's here him out. We've all ended up with unwanted legacies from our illicit endeavours, have we not?" I asked, glancing meaningfully at Feldon's crotch in case he couldn't pick up the reference. I wouldn't have thought he'd forget, since he'd been scratching for days and had worried it might grow wool at one point.

"Let's just hear the man out, shall we? He's not going anywhere with the lot of us around him, and we can always apply some Verudite if we doubt the veracity of his words.

"So, old man," I said to the dwarf, "What brings you out of the mountains, and where did you fight the former owner of that medallion. It might be a good place to begin our search for the blackguards who scarred Feldon's life so dastardly, leaving him the gibbering fool he is today."

 

"Well I left to search for a magic herb to heal our king and he told me that some Tarant's might know. And where I killed the guy who had the amulent was in that town right below our clan entrance."

 

"I don't trust you" I announced. "If you got it from a town, you would have had to have killed the whole town. No small village would let someone just come through and kill it's inhabitants without getting all riled up..."

 

I saw the Sheriff glance at my crotch and felt ashamed. Apparently he still remembered that time we had bathed together in a cold mountain stream.
"what is the name of this village, Dwarf? And why did you kill the man wearing this medallion? Speak quickly, for I feel the Rage of The Ram rising within me."

 

"Sheriff!What the hell are you talking about!I hope Feldon you won't get angry but we have a much more important quest than that of searching for some brigands."

 

Blast it! If only I'd have been quicker, I may have been able to stop Andrew before he finished. Lamentably, I did not act in time, and we'd now all face the consequences of Andrew's ignorance and my sluggishness.

I siddled away from Feldon, reaching once again for the Stunaliser, and thankful it was a non-lethal (for the most part) weapon, but mostly just thankful that it was a weapon.

"Um ... Andrew ... you wouldn't by any chance want to retract that alast comment, would you?" I attempted forlornly.

 

"That is enough I am leaving you guys and not telling you guys anything, because you guys keep threatening me and I am not even afraid of you.And I do not remember what the name of the town was...Silver something I think."

I then start to walk off.

 

"No no no...Sit down"my ogre pulls up the dwarf and throws him in to the chair breaking it.
"And Sheriff why are you so nervous I think our friend Feldon is an undertsanding fellow and does realize the importance of our quest"

 

The greatest shot in all the Unified Kingdom! Er, down here.

A pop was heard outside Madam Lil's. Then another, louder pop. Then, as if in reply a varienty of louder bigger pops, some clanks, crashes, slashes, explosions and the sound of a launched sheep, or possibly a calf.

The bar entrance swung open and someone dived in, shutting the door behind him. It might take a moment to find him, he's down, way down. A bit short, even for a gnome, the little man wore eye gear on his forehead and was hastily reloading two long ranged pistols with an auto-loader when he looked up.

His jaw dropped. He had expected a drunk or two and some half-naked ladies. Instead, he saw the bartender with a hole in him and some men who seemed to be doing...something to a dwarf. Brobably a bordello-hazing of some kind, to initiate him into their vile clutches. He readjusted his top hat, tipping it to the strangers. He did not like the way some of them were looking at him.

"Well, er, I really do hate to interupt... maybe I should be going..." He swung open the door just as another bang was heard. A bullet swooshed through it, bounced off a doorknob and back into the bartender. Pentalope decided he'd like to stay a while longer.

"Er... carry on, pretend I'm not here, honest." He said, crouching behind a window.


[Out of character. This is my first post, was it okay? Don't spare my feelings! But, if you say it was bad, I'll have to kill Santa. Quite a predicament, isn't it? No, no, just kidding. *cough* Er, hello:]

<font size=-1>[ This Message was edited by: Pentalope Hogswallop The Third on 2001-12-12 15:02 ]</font>

 

"You're not going anywhere, Dwarf, until I know everything about that Medallion and where you got it! The Slug Riders have caused my people too much pain over the years. If you're one of them, your day of judgement is nigh."
I fingered my blade, testing its sharpness with my thumb.It would give me great pleasure to dispatch a Slug Rider, but if I could find their lair, I would kill them all!
I was prepared to mete out a little torture, the kind the riders hd inflicted on my village. There had been no virgin wool for a generation.
"And now...talk!"

 

"Not here Feldon" I said. "If we're going to interrogate him, and I say we do, then we're leaving Tarant first. Get your ogre to pick him up Andrew, and let's get out of here. Sounds like someone else knows we're here. If they are who I think they are, the sooner we get out of here, the better."

I started to look for the best way out of this bordello - I could get us out of the city if we could get out of the bordello.

 

"Alright I guess I will not get the rest I wanted for I am going to have to take you to the town"
I walked off
"You guys know where any horses are???"

 

I breathed a sigh of relief. Apparently, either Feldon had learned to control the Rage a bit or he hadn't taken Andrew's comment to heart. Fortunately, that meant I hadn't been forced to - as they say in The Boil - 'cap his arse' with the Stunaliser.

Just as things had seemed to become a little less tense, there was some kind of furor outside, and the door spat a small person inwards. The eyegear on his head made him look like a PRAT, but sometimes appearances could be deceptive. At least he probably wasn't a mage, a fact which heartened me with all the magic going on around here.

Feldon, hadn't spotted the fellow yet, and I didn't want the newcomer to accidently fuel the Rage, so I moved to intercept him. Thinking he may be interested in one of my inventions, I waved the Stunaliser at him as I approached.

"I say that man! Have you seen one of these before? D'ya know what it does?" So saying I pushed it towards his face in case the eyegear was a sign on myopia, "I could show you if ya like!"

 

"That Slug Rider is getting away" I warned Feldon. "I'd go after him if I were you."

The Sheriff seemed to be 'talking' to the newcomer. Dropping subtly threatening hints might have been a more accurate description though.

There still seemed to be unfriendlies outside though, and by the sounds of it, lots of them. Too many for us to handle.

"Andrew," I called, "get your ogre to knock a hole in the back wall if you can. I'm getting us out of here."

 

"What you think my ogre is?A giant?But he can bust some windows open.And how much longer are we going to muck around with this dwarf here?I'll be with you for a day then I'll be off to Ashbury." my ogre busted open a large window and I unsummoed him 'cause I was getting too tired.

 

He's got a gun!

Pentalope watched them threaten the poor dwarf, but then someone was approaching him. He gripped his pistol. The man had a weapon, he was waving it. Pentalope rolled away from the man into a corner and pointed his pistols at him.

"Don't shoot, old bean. I mean you and your bordello-gang no harm!"

 

"Damnit!Let's go!"I jumped through the window.

 

"Shoot? What me, who would I sho- oh I see!" I said putting the Stunaliser back into the deep pocket of my great coat. Apparently the newcomer was little jumpy. It probably had something to do with being small, I supposed.

His pistols looked depressingly like standard models with no apparent embellishments. Oh well, maybe he wasn't a gun-smith or was so cunning an artificer that I couldn't see the improvements.

Cautiously, bearing his nervous disposition (and dual pistols) in mind, I approached him. "What's all the row outside then? Sounded like the Locomunator did the time I tried to run her on distillate of horseradish."

As I spoke, Andrew unaccountably threw himself through a window. Oh well, if you want to know whats in a mages head, consult a compost heap, as my old dad used to say.



<font size=-1>[ This Message was edited by: Sheriff Fatman on 2001-12-13 10:34 ]</font>

 

Upon a cloer look...

These pistols seem in their own right, quite the work of a PRAT, or something similar. One pistol has a long skinny barrel with a looking glass on the end, the other seems to be a shotgun with a black funnel on top, smelling of fuel. On the gnome's back, there's a pack, shiny gears and a long metal tube sticking out.

"Locomunator? That wouldn't be like my Kite-powered fortified wagon, would it? Oh, oh, I do say, what's that thing you were waving? And, er, why is the mage jupping out a window? And why are you beating the dwarf? Your not a sizist, are you?" He asks, his eyes narrowing.

He finishes his hail of questions and peeks out the window. A pang of a bullet is heard in reply.

"Er, well, they seem to believe, I er, alleviated a bank of it's contents. The nerve!" Despite himself, he readjusts two large bags hanging from his pack that clink slightly.


<font size=-1>[ This Message was edited by: Pentalope Hogswallop The Third on 2001-12-13 13:31 ]</font>