I'm still alive.

I was passing a pub a few years back, and a guy was running around the building in a "Condom-Man" costume, with the condom mask, a big C on his chest, and a strap-on, complete with a jumbo-sized rubber attached to his groin.

 

There he is! Get the BAT! Get the bat!!

 

Looks like he's got everything but the fake dong. It's just as well...that image would have some scarring effects on young minds. It's why I'm so screwed up today.

 

Ahhh. The truth comes out...

 

Yup. The year I turned 13 was crazy.

 

I remember we made a condom man from our scapegoat. Bought a huge condom (about 30 cm in diameter) on the fun-market, cought him after physical fitness while he changed his clothes, "used" condom on his huge head and made holes for nostrils and eyes. After he runned to 1 floor of school, he was noticed by teacher, and the guy who was so intelligent to make this gotta kicked out of the school. After this accident scapegoat was only a trashman with trashbin on the head.

 

ER.. So it's part your fault that he's now a bum?

 

....No, if you mean that guy who is now "retired from studying", it's a fault of condom-man.

 

Hey Gross: This is a little odd. My thirteenth year was my strangest one too.........

(dee-deee-dee-dee dee-deee-dee-dee)

 

See what happens when you break into your teen-years? I say, if a child will be exposed to something truely life-changing or mind-altering by the time they turn 13, they should be executed at 12.

 

To Gross: I'd have to make that conditional. Was the event for the good or for the bad?

 

Bad event. If it's a good change, killing them would be like giving someone their favorite food, followed by Syrup of Ipecac.
Mine was a bad one. Why do you think I chose to kill all of the pre-teens?