The Truth (As I see it)

I'm pretty off the rocker. I take 8 pills a day to control my hallucinations and symptoms of depression, but really that's divided into the loxitane (for schizoaffective disorder), effexor (for depression), and seroquel (also for schizoaffective disorder). These meds keep me on the level at which I am; without them I'd be much, much worse.
I post here under no false pretenses; I have great difficulty lying, even to save my ass. So, regardless of actual truth, I'm really not lying to you when I say I'm god. I'm having trouble believing it myself, I mean, I can't perform miracles, unless you take the soapstone pipes and sculptures I've created without proper eye protection or even something more advanced than my own hands to hold said items while they're being drilled as miracles, there you go. The only talent I know I possess is the ability to draw from my own idealized body structures and with no frame of reference, (i.e. a model) perfectly proportioned bodies, ala Michelangelo's David, only on paper and in graphite.
I'm good at anything I try to do, and I was recently taken into my college's honors program.
My experiences in this life have lead me to believe there is something more to the world than what we normally see.
As for the things I normally see; during the day, on surfaces illuminated by the sun are points of energy constantly and randomly finding their own paths across the sky. I can change my eyes' focus, but those points of energy remain in my vision until the sun sets. Occasionally, these points of energy will turn into birds or insects and fly around me. The insects regularly appear and disappear right before my eyes, the birds appear most often out of clouds. Sometimes the birds will split into three or more smaller birds.
It was 20 degrees outside last december, I was sitting on my stoop smoking a pot substitute (don't do this at home kids), and a stink bug randomly appeared flying haphazardly between my legs and then disappeared upon landing next to me. It was moving with far too much energy to have been outside the whole time, and I have no idea where it went after it landed. I heard it hit the steps, but couldn't find the thing.
Take from this what you will, I already know I'm not sane. All I ask is that you respond to me in kind; that is, if I say something crazy, and it catches your interest, say something crazy right back to me. I don't know if I scare anyone, but I want you all to know I mean you no harm.

 

I come in peace...


Dude, we know you're completely bat-shit. I, for one, just figure when you say something crazy you can't help it and you're being you. Even if you can help it, it still provides me with amusement.

They give seroquel for schizoaffective? I have a few friends with bipolar on it as well.

 

Actually, I regularly see a similar phenomenon, of motes of light zooming around and morphing into birds and insects. Not always in sunlight alone though.

I explain it as autistic hypervigilance tracking ionised particles in the atmospheric wake of bioelectromagnetic fields. But that's just me.

I can also sketch realistic anatomy off the top of my head, I call it Drawtism.

I don't say I'm god, but once or twice I've been consumed by a notion of omniscience, which included that insight into the duality of light and matter.

I also have certain dreams of inevitable deja vu.

Say, you're not one of my split personalities are you?

 

Does exposure to soapstone make you crazy? If this hasn't been proven, somebody on this forum is getting a nobel prize.

EDIT: While posting, I caught a glimpse of (what I think might be) an EVE Online banner ad, stating "Detach From Reality" for one brief moment before the page redirected.

 

Should try to be sane...

 

Man, you crazy...

 

My biggest problem is anger. I'm slow to anger, but when I do get angry I explode. I'm afraid of my temper, because when it happens I wish death on people. Even loved ones. Because of this I question whether I truly love anyone, and I certainly don't want to kill anyone. I have arguments with other people in my head. Sometimes real people, but my subconscious plays the other role. I tend to go over and over these arguments, until I start to take the upper hand in them, but it gets me so mad. I don't even know why I do it.
As far as I can tell, I've been like this my whole life. It's only recently that the god dilemma has surfaced, though, I've always felt responsible for the earth.

 

You can't be god, Gross. I am. Just ask wobbler, he can testify to the validity of my claim.

Anyway, I don't believe either yours or ytzk's claim about being able to draw anatomically correct from the top of your head, but I'd like you to prove me wrong. Maybe a movie-clip of somesorts would do the trick.

Also; of course there are layers of reality that we can't see. Our senses are quite limited. Then again, there are things we can percieve that other beings cannot. There is nothing supernatural about it.

 

We only traditionally see three colors. There's a shrimp that sees 12. There are things with greater and lesser perceptions than humans, but they are gifted in other ways. What an ant sees probably only amounts to what is light and darkness, but what it smells allows it to recognize its own, what it can lift allows it to move mountains, and what it can hear allows it to take vengeance on those who might be so foolish as to attack one of the colony.
Oh, and I'll get a camera and draw something for you. You've really never heard of anyone drawing perfectly proportioned bodies from thought alone? It's a gift of autism, I think.

 

I'm extremely tired, and basically shut down brain-wise, and I feel that I might the missing the significance of this point...

 

My drawtism is a function of vivid imagination and good memory. A picture in my head can be so clear in front of my eyes that I can just trace over it onto the paper.

I could draw a pretty decent human figure at the age of six, and actually studying human anatomy has given me a much clearer image to work from.

I once made a clay figure from the skeleton outwards, sculpting each muscle group onto the skeleton then finally the skin.

I cheerfully withdraw the claim of perfection, but it is a neat trick.

 

Stop making shit up guys. That's what the roleplaying forum is for.

 

Isn't this the correct thread for delusions of grandeur?

 

Acturality this is the most fun I have since Surfork country when the police percient commander ask me to ask two armed group commicting terrorist act against each other and threaten the peace of the country to surround to the police. I walk up to then one was lead by than KGB General and the other by than CIA Officer who hated each other. I simple told both of then to sorround to the locial police or be shot death by the police. The CIA office started to raise his gun so I hit hard in the gion pennis area. Both side gave up to the police giveing up they weapon includeing they biowarfare agents. They where kept in seperate holding cell as far away from each other as possible. Unknow all three superpower of usa,ussr and china have one of they ICBM goes thought than luanch cycle but no launch and then got than radio communicate from the SECOND DEPARTMENT warning about the illegal
armed conflict between america CIA and KGB in where I live back then. Then warning came from 5 orditing doomday weapon of alien make of total destorying earth. The shit really hit the fan then. China then reported to both usa and ussr the name of the two lleader who want than personal grude fight. The Sec General of the Party sent than letter to the commander of the police department apoly for the action of the KBG General who acted without aproval or oder from the government . He said he was worry about the possible of local people being harm or killed by the action of both party. He want the KGB agent release when than Russia Army major and KGB colon show up to take then back home for dispince action. The CIA office try to use his get out of jail free card so I just tear it up in front of him violation National Security laws, later the government gave me the right to tear up get out of jail free card.

Where do you live baby.

 

Gee Japes you just raped the English language.

 

Sounds like an excellent Peter Chimaera novel.

 

I don't think there's anything wrong with you, just that you think something is. Granted, I haven't read all the threads, but from what I read here, it's all perfectly normal.

 

Man, you crazy...

 

Not at all!

 

That's what a crazy person would say!