The Admins Strike Back

So, after years of our beloved staff, I'm pleased to announce that the covert op which has kept me away from here has finally produced results worth sharing. Suspected of being one of the masterminds which hired the tree which took the life of Jarinor, and many other members of staff now gone, this tree was taken down in what's reported as 'natural causes.' If you need me, I'll be out in the hills, tapping maple trees for delicious, delicious information.

http://gizmodo.com/after-more-than-100-years-californias-iconic-tunnel-tr-1790964594

 

Go home Darkfool, you're drunk.

 

So, this tree hired The Tree?

 

What do you call a tree that sings monotonic rap surrounded by bundles of cash?

Tree Fiddy.

 

Clearly we know where Darkfool was when he was drunk in 1973: The Tree of Ténéré.

 

Well that's a pisser.

 

One of them. It appears there's a bit of a tree cabal seeking our demise. Some Canadian maples hit me onto a rumor about some ancient tree in Africa being one of the key players. I'm headed there next with my chainsaw.

 

If the Tree Cabal finds out about the maples, they'll will be very angry about their treeson, ah?

 

I'm hArboring a lot of hate for that pun you just made.

 

It was only on the second reading that I got that joak.

 

Personally I'm pine-ning for a time when everyone wood stop making tree puns, yew're all ridiculous!

 

Yeah. We all are root-ing for that, but people are too stoaked to stop.

 

These puns have simply gone too fir, and y'all moss stop.

 

To anybody who engages in the use of puns: I want to burn you like the faggot you are.

 

I think TDC won the thread with his mention of faggots, which is a socially acceptable and nerdily relevant play on harsh gay slang because of its mention in Lord of the Rings, whereby he has maintained that perfect combination of wood-pun and ironic gay-burning euphemism that I think we were all secretly hoping this thread would culminate in.

When I look back on this thread it will always give me wood, and also an erection. Interpret that inscrutable meaning however you want to.

 

I think TDC lost the thread by being a whiny beech.

 

You should all make like a tree and split.

 

Oh this place will never change