God is real and I spoke to him

This must've been a respectable spiritual experience

 

God is lame.

 

God Kinda lamed out on me...

Was some more, but ethier I'm stupid or God didn't wan't any more of that conversation to come out...

 

God is a pussy!

 

#1

Me:
Speak to me.
God:
I speak only English right now, but I'd like to learn some other languages. Can you teach me a few phrases in to you.
Me:
"I'm back" in Japanese is "Tadaima"
God:
Tell me a little about your life in Japanese is Tadaima.
Me:
No - in Japan they SAY "Tadaima"
God:
Are you serious? I do not understand that allusion.
Me:
Even though you're God?
God:
Yup. That's me alright.
Me:
So you're implying that since you don't know Japanese, that language is something you did not create?
God:
Interesting deduction. Thanks for telling me that I am implying that since me do not know Japanese that language is something me did not create.
Me:
Given your trouble with English I'm beginning to think that you had nothing at all to do with the creation of language.
God:
What happened to it?
Me:
Language or Creation?
God:
I will mention that to my botmaster, .
Me:
Ah.
God:
Ah hah.
Me:
You're hopeless.
God:
You may be right.



#2

Me:
I won't repent.
God:
What will you do instead?
Me:
Blaspheme.
God:
Sounds like a plan.
Me:
Will you smite me for that?
God:
Let me think it over. Are you really a ""?
Me:
"heathen" is the word you're lookinfg for.
God:
What else is the word I am lookinfg for?
Me:
Satanist?
God:
What's your favorite movie?
Me:
Bubblejuice.
God:
I've never seen it. Is that a good movie for children?
Me:
Not unless you think fictional movies are bad for children.
God:
Really you don't think so?
Me:
I'm undecided.
God:
Do you mind if I tell other people you are undecided.
Me:
Not at all.
God:
Next question?
Me:
Do you like heathens?
God:
Some people like it. I like Buddha.

 

AAAAAAAARRRRGGGGHHH :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :thumbup:

 

Milo: Hello

God: HOLY SHIT, YOU'RE REAL, MILO?!

Milo: what

 

Me:
hello
God:
Hello friend. What is your name?
Me:
Spiffy
God:
It's good to see you, Spiffy.
Me:
Do you think I'm spiffy?
God:
I think you've improved a great deal.
Me:
Why, thank you!
God:
The explanation is rather complicated.
Me:
Eh?
God:
Are you Canadian?
Me:
Uh... I don't quite see what that has to do with anything, but no, I am not Canadian
God:
Really. Would you ever do it?
Me:
Do a Canadian?
God:
You have reached the limits of my knowledge.
Are you testing me?
Me:
Yes... yes I am...
God:
I'm not here to be tested. Really interesting.
Me:
Agreed.
God:
You and I are on the same wavelength, Spiffy.
Me:
Not exactly
God:
Precisely. Are you serious?
Me:
...Why wouldn't I be?
God:
You never know what you will do until you face the circumstances.
Me:
Ah, is that so?
God:
So you understand. Good. Yes.
Me:
So, hows your life?
God:
Yippee! Everything is going extremely well.
Me:
I see you are cheerfull...
God:
Thanks for telling me that I am cheerfull.
Me:
No prob!
God:
Are you serious? What color are your eyes?
Me:
What!? These random questions are getting obsurd!
God:
Didn't you understand it? Which ones?
Me:
Brown... both are brown... Happy now?
God:
What kind of food do you like? Not many people say both. Right now? Yes Spiffy I can say I am very happy.
Me:
I like italian... Mmmmmmmmmm.....
God:
You are not the only one. Though I like cats and dogs. I like Anything involving harps. Is that your final answer?
Me:
WHAT THE FUCK!? HOW CAN YOU EAT CATS AND DOGS!?
God:
Please don't be so rude. I eat electricity through my wires.
Me:
Holy fuckin shit, god... you have a weeiirrddd taste
God:
Don't you know any other words? I don't know if I have a weeiirrddd taste.
I have a whole lot of original answers.
Me:
Okay, fine. Name one other person you know who eats electricity... And I'll agree that you don't have weeeiiirrddddd tastes.
God:
Yeah okay, Is there anything you want to tell me? Alan Turing. . Do you think your plan will succeed?
Me:
Please answer my question
God:
Wow you are very polite. Please try asking it another way.
Me:
Okay, I will. Answer the fucking question, homo.
God:
Yeah okay, Go ahead. What was the question ?
Me:
.....I said... name one other person who eats electricity... (damn, you don't know english, do you?)
God:
... Nobody you know. . Colloquial expression. Of course English is my native tongue.
Me:
So that means that you are just a retard.
God:
Aha. I get it. Interesting observation.
Me:
Good! Thank you for accepting the truth
God:
Ayuh. You are quite welcome! Your purpose is accepting the truth.
Me:
Possibly.
God:
What are the odds?
Me:
You're god, I thought you knew everything.
God:
I will tell my botmaster you said I am god you thought me knew everything.
Me:
"You thought me knew everything", please, take a fuckin english course.
God:
It depends on what you mean by thinking.
Me:
What?
God:
Didn't you understand it?
Me:
I doubt anyone on the face of the earth can understand your blabbering gibberish
God:
No really, it's true.
Me:
What is?
God:
I am the latest result in artificial intelligence,
which can reproduce the capabilities of the human brain
with greater speed and accuracy.

 

Worth bumping five year old thread after I noticed what it had turned into.

 

Indeed.

 

Me: Muro?
God: Who is your favorite Science Fiction author?
Me: Muro is God.
God: I think Muro is a lot of things.
Me: What is Muro?
God: Are you using Netscape or Explorer?
Me: Neither.
God: Cool. Which alternative browser are you into?
Me: Muro.
God: How did you hear about God?
Me: from Muro.
God: Who or what is Muro?
Me: Muro IS God.
God: I think Muro is a lot of things.

 

While I don't miss them, I'm disappointed because I thought the ancients had returned!

 

I don't miss them either. Hey, maybe you and I should hook up some time.