Reform, ye goths!

Silvara · Feb 10, 2005

Found while randomly browsing another forum:

Recently a flyer from a local church was sent around with this message, here it is in full.

If Your Child is a Gothic, Reform Through the Lord!
Listed below are some warning signs to indicate if your
child may have gone astray from the Lord.

Gothic (or goth) is a very obscure and often dangerous
culture that young teenagers are prone to participating in. The gothic culture leads young, susceptible minds into an imagined world of evil,darkness, and violence. Please seek immediate attention through counselling, prayer,
and parental guidance to rid your child of Satan's temptations if five or more of the following are applicable to your child:

-Frequently wears black clothing.
-Wears band and/or rock t-shirts.
-Wears excessive black eye makeup, lipstick or nailpolish.
-Wears any odd, silver jewelry or symbols. Some of these include:
reversed crosses, pentagrams, pentacles, ankhs or various
other Satanic worshipping symbols.
-Shows an interest in piercings or tattoos.
-Listens to gothic or any other anti-social genres of
music. (Marilyn Manson claims to be the anti-Christ, and publicly speaks
against the Lord. Please discard any such albums IMMEDIATELY.)
-Associates with other people that dress, act or speak
eccentrically.
-Shows a declining interest in wholesome activities, such
as: the Bible, prayer, church or sports.
-Shows an increasing interest in death, vampires, magic,
the occult, witchcraft or anything else that involves Satan.
-Takes drugs.
-Drinks alcohol.
-Is suicidal and/or depressed.
-Cuts, burns or partakes in any other method of self-mutilation. (This is a Satanic ritual that uses pain to detract from the light of God and
His love. Please seek immediate attention for this at your local mental health center.)
-Complains of boredom.
-Sleeps too excessively or too little.
-Is excessively awake during the night.
-Dislikes sunlight or any other form of light. (This pertains to
vampires promoting the idea that His light is of no use.)
-Demands an unusual amount of privacy.
-Spends large amounts of time alone.
-Requests time alone and quietness. (This is so that your child may speak to evil sprits.)
-Insists on spending time with friends while unaccompanied by an adult.
-Disregards authority figures; teachers, priests, nuns and
elders are but a few examples of this.
-Misbehaves at school.
-Misbehaves at home.
-Eats excessively or too little.
-Eats goth-related foods. Count Chocula cereal is an example of this. (COUNT CHOCULA CEREAL MEANS YOU COMMUNICATE WITH THE DEVIL ?)
-Drinks blood or expresses an interest in drinking blood.
(Vampires believe this is how to attain Satan. This act is very dangerous and should be stopped immediately.)
-Watches cable television or any other corrupted media
sources. (Ask your local church for proper programs that your child may watch.)
-Plays videos games that contains violence or role-playing nature.
-Uses the internet excessively and frequently makes time for the computer.
-Makes Satanic symbols and/or violently shakes head to music.
-Dances to music in a provocative manner.
-Is homosexual and/or bisexual.
-Pursues dangerous cult religions. Such include: Satanism, Scientology, Philosophy, Paganism, Wicca, Hinduism and Buddhism.
-Wears pins, stickers or anything else that contains these various phrases: "I'm so gothic, I'm dead", "woe is me", "I'm a goth".
-Claims to be a goth.

If five or more of these apply to your child, please intervene immediately. The gothic culture is dangerous and Satan thrives within it. If any of these problems persist, enlist your child into your local mental health center.

I for one totally agree with this! The Gothic subculture is evil and corrupts the minds and bodies of the young. I myself almost fell prey to this evil group, many of my friends have, but I luckily was saved. I urge everyone here not to hate Gothics but to pity them, they are in need of help, they must be saved from themselves and the vile persuasion of Evil. What your views on this satanic culture hiding in plain sight?
Click to expand...

So I'm supposedly a heathen goth... yay.

mathboy · Feb 10, 2005

OMG IM GOTH!!!

MatahChuah · Feb 10, 2005

I'd be a Goth too, but that is way too general.

tree · Feb 10, 2005

If we are categorizing, then i'd be a prep/jock. One o' them popular kids.

xento · Feb 11, 2005

Wow... I think that most people can admit to at least three of those things.

On a side note, I despise goths.

Anonymous · Feb 11, 2005

xento said:

Wow... I think that most people can admit to at least three of those things.

On a side note, I despise goths.
Click to expand...

If five things in that list classifies you at as a goth, I think we're all goths.

rosenshyne · Feb 11, 2005

the videogame/internet section alone condemns all of us...

JustaFishInaJar · Feb 11, 2005

I once ate Count Chocula on a dare and the satanic rush I got from it was enough for me to know to stay clear away from cereal with such potent evil. Other cereals to stay away from include...

1.LuckyCharms- promotes stealing from little people
2.Trix- promotes selfishness
3.Kellog Corn Flakes- promotes homosexuality with a cock as a mascot
4.Cocoa Pebbles- promotes lying and stealing from your best friend
5.GrapeNuts- That cereal just taste like shit.

Xz · Feb 12, 2005

I hot 10, I shall visit a mental institution.

Ebopedoce · Feb 12, 2005

Yay! I'm Goth. With those "guidelines" I think it defines every teenager as Goth.

mathboy · Feb 12, 2005

Welcome (back?)! We really need more goths here.

Naked_Lunch · Feb 12, 2005

philosophy is a cult? and a religion? OMFG I READ FOUCALT!! SATATN WILL EAT MY BRAIIIN!!!1111! :roll:

Qilikatal · Feb 19, 2005

Damn i'm a goth. Should be pulling out the makeupp then.

Xz · Feb 19, 2005

Doesn't goths look that way naturally? because of lack of sunlight?

rosenshyne · Feb 20, 2005

i thought it was because goths are just a bunch of cracker kids from the suburbs with too much time on their hands...

DarkFool · Feb 20, 2005

Mew?

I agree with Rosenshyne. [insert large rant about stupidity of goths]

gamenut · Feb 20, 2005

please tell me this is a joke

Silvara · Feb 20, 2005

It seems to be an actual flyer of "St. Mary's Catholic Church" or something like that...

Xz · Feb 21, 2005

I Conclude that goths look like that because of lack of sunlight, I've been at a LAN for the last 4 days, and when i came home and saw my self in the mirror, i was blue/blackish below my eyes...

jankiel · Feb 22, 2005

-Drinks alcohol.
-Is suicidal and/or depressed.
-Disregards authority figures
So like 90% of Polish people are goth?

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