What are your most unimpressive achievements?

I actually feel bad about that episode, somewhat. She refused to continue and I scared her into giving me most of the money back. Doesn't change the fact that she was some country bumpkin with a bad attitude, though. If the service is good and the girl is really friendly, I'd never think about intentionally hurting her.

I like taking a little bit of viagra (the Chinese knock off, gold in color) now and then. It numbs your sensitivity, so you can keep going much longer. It's a bit hard to reach an orgasm if you take too much, though.

 

This makes you out to be some sort of sexual predator if it's true.

You rationalized violent behavior because of someone else's attitude. It's her damn job to have sex with you, and your dick's too damn big. Of course she'll stop if she's bleeding. You do realize women's vaginas are a part of their bodies, don't you? And a female prostitute's vagina tends to be a portion of how they earn money? If you break her vagina, she might not be able to do a third of her job.
Let's face it;
You're bad at sex and communication.
Learn how to do both and you'll end up fucking less faces and intimidating fewer prostitutes after destroying their vaginas.

 

Enough said really.

 

Had sex with a really petite girl last night. She was gripping me and moaning the whole time, really enjoying the ride. She was very tight, 太爽了. I was cautious and I don't think I ever put it all the way in.

It's funny, when I ask them what kind of dicks the locals have, they show half the size of mine. Geez! Yeah, basically the girth is not a big problem, but the length is. Their cunts are nowhere as deep. Even the sluttiest girls (with somewhat loose cunts) will feel pain if I start hammering it all the way in (especially when doggy style).

 

I don't understand who it is you are trying to impress here with your lies.

 

Aww, poor Zanza is jealous because he can't write in Chinese.

 

Most women don't enjoy being rammed in the cervix. That's something you have to look for, i.e. "my penis is so large I am nearly guaranteed to ram your cervix. If in to that, call 888-DIK-LIES."
Seriously, the locals you're being compared to average about 10 centimeters. If you're twice their size, you're smaller than me.

 

My dick is three feet long. It is true because I said it on an internet forum.

 

QFT

 

This thread has really exposed sides of my fellow Lords that I never anticipated. I'm glad Crypton feels comfortable enough to share his suicide attempts with (although I credit Grossenschwamm for laying much of the foundation for that).

I
guess
I'm
glad
that
Drog feels comfortable enough to share his forays into casual rape. I especially enjoy the bit where he bullies the prostitute into getting any amount of his money back. It reminds me of a story my friend once told me. Are "a friend's" achievements appropriate fodder for this thread?

 

I actually figured Crypton was trying to bait me, given the eye roll emote.

 

I don't like your signature, it oozes butthurt.

 

Remember when your avatar was similar? Not much has changed really, just slap on some emo make up.

 

As creator of this thread, I hereby declare "Yes". I'd also just like to remind you that there's nothing shameful about exploring your gay tendencies.

 

Smuel, you opened up gay tendencies for discussion, and since it's your thread, you should probably break the ice so everybody feels comfortable.

 

Okay, well, one time I was about to have sex with a Chinese transsexual, but when she saw my enormous white cock she refused to do anal. 我不会说中文

 

I...was once the big spoon. Clothed, seperate sleeping bags.
Didn't find out about it until morning.
也沒有任何人，但黑齒。

 

我只是他媽的愛谷歌翻譯。