The T-A Dating Game

wayne-scales - failing to explain what he means since the early teens.

 

The prize? A lifetime of awkward feelings knowing that one such member could be a potentially suitable life-partner for yourself. The bonus prize? The first person to post in this thread gets a gold star added to their avatar, of course awarded under moderator discretion.*

 

Re:

This is pure gold.

 

I've never been on a date. My relationships just kinda happen.

 

Like, surprise sex?

 

Something like that.

 

A thoughtful silence descends over the house.

 

Hey, Yuki, I don't want to alarm you, but surprise sex is also called rape where I live...

 

Only if it's non-consensual.

 

Ah, the classic "she was asking for it" defence.

I've never had a relationship that wasn't the result of a date arranged over the intenet. Frankly, it's a mystery to me how the human race managed to propagate itself before the invention of dating websites.

 

Poor old Smuel.

Once upon a time, termite and cockroaches were the same thing, then termites invented cities and lost their pigmentation, their genitals and their free will.

Humans smell each other's musk, and their hindbrain kicks in, unless it has been choked to death by a necktie.

 

Re:

Maybe that's where I've been going wrong. When I meet a woman I talk to her instead.

 

Talk!? Poor old Smuel.

Human beings, when "dating", are supposed to sniff each other until the female is sufficiently impressed. Then, you are to roar as triumphantly as possible in order to frighten off any potential challengers. Finally, after mating, you are to run away as fast (not to mention as quietly) as you can, lest you favour the idea of being devoured by your significant other.

Also, I think you should apologise to wayne-scales for accusing him of failing, in any sense of the word.

(Additionally, I love the fact that a bot revived this thread. Good show!)

 

Re:

"And that's how these panties got stuck up my nose, officer."
"Well, sir, maybe you should stick to putting them on one leg at a time."