Sorry

Sometimes I have beens wondering if I should convert to islam just so that I can have a good exuse to not eating bacon. "Not liking the taste" does not seem to be a good enough exuse here in Norway.

 

You should let him know that. Norse people seek redemption as a convenient excuse from bacon.

 

See what I mean?

 

I hate the taste of bacon. I think bacon tastes awful. However given all the weird stares that I get from people, when I say that I don't like bacon, it seems that claiming to be a muslim would be the better chioce of action.

I have numerous stories where I do not help myself to bacon and the first question I get is: "are you religious?". Then they ask if im on a diet, if i'm a vegetarian or if I just don't eat pork out of healt reasons. When I then have answered NO to all of these they are out of opptions so they ask me why?
When I then continue to say that i don't like bacon I get a long charade that goes somewhere like this:

"WHAT you doooon't like bacon. Oh my god. I have never seen this before. WOW you don't like bacon? (and then comes the sign that has lead me to belive that bacon leads to loss of graymatter) WHY? Why do you not like bacon? It is so crispy and ohh greasy."

During all of this they(everyone around the table and the tables close to us, where you by the way will notice all conversation has ceased and all ears are franaticlly listening to the conversation at your table) stare at me with eyes oppened so wide that I could probably jam a full-sized carrier in there without obscuring vision.

Then when I have finally changed the discussion to something else a waiter pops his head inn and ask; if there was actually someone here at this table that does not like bacon? And there we go again.

When I then eat any meal with these people that has bacon as an optional ingredient everyone will open upp the subject.

If I however had only said.
"I em a muslim"
they would answer somewhere along the lines "OK, I can understand that."

Is that explonation good enough for you?

 

Isn't Mullah/Mulla a title? As in capital m?

 

Weird... I've seen plenty of people write mullah with capital m in the middle of sentences. I guess they're just ignorant, as I was.

 

Wow, norwegian reporters are that stupid?

 

Not just the reporters...

 

You know who makes Norweigans look smart... Norway's neighbors... They're ridiculous.

 

Quilikatal, apparently you haven't eaten bacon from the Waffle House. Statistics show that the tastiness of a piece of bacon is directly proportional to its level of greasiness, and that bacon is at least 25% greasier when served up by a wrinkly, one-toothed, tattooed waitress who is wearing a paper hat and earning minimum wage.

Ah, the Waffle House. Fine dining at its best.

 

The Pancake Parish serves good bacon. Points to whoever knows where that is before I tell them.

 

Why would I want bacon that tastes more bacon, than ordinary bacon?

 

Yea, and since the only plants that grow in Norway are lichens and pine trees, those are your only options. You can eat Bacon, or you can eat moss. Or wood.

 

I never knew you were Episcopical.