My water bottle

So I went out tonight I know and I found the side of the bottle was split. I could see ice all the way up, I am assuming this means the integrity of the bottle is ruined and if the ice melts the water will seep through that block. So now I am stuck, my favorite that my mum gave me is now ruined, if I let it defrost it will melt and cause problems, however if I don't melt it well I feel I am just wasting it. What do I do?

 

I think your advice to anyone else asking the same question would be "man up, bitch."

I wouldn't be so insensitive, personally. My advice is to hold it gently over the rubbish bin and let it go.

 

I thought you were the asexual... or do I have you confused with someone else?

 

Crypton is about as asexual as a rabbit in the spring time.

 

That's too bad. A bottle given to me by my mom was "borrowed" by a girlfriend, who then dumped me and "forgot" to give it back.

 

Let's go out for lunch and braid each other's hair gross.

 

Initially, I thought "No." However, if we both continually say "no-homo" while braiding each others' hair, it's totally not gay.

 

It's only gay if you enjoy it. we'll pretend to hate it when we are rimming.

 

He doesn't need to sweetly throw it away like some bedwetting Nancy! What he needs to do is REALLY man up, and get out the duct tape and/or lighter!

 

Hmm...what do you think, Zanza? A manly bubbled-up scar on your bottle, or a manly line of silver?

 

I agree, if you're going to throw it away, at least throw it away like a man. You should set it on fire, round-house kick it off a cliff into the ocean, and shoot it as it falls down into the mouth of an open shark. Then dive off the cliff with a knife between your teeth, stab the shark, wrestle the bottle from its open jaws, climb back up the cliff with the bottle between your teeth, and then bury it under a massive pile of stones.

Then, two days later the bottle will come back to life as a zombie and try to kill you, but hey, that's life.