ITT bad poetry

A hippy who styled himself "ytzk"
Would constantly sound pessimistic.
"The environment's dying,"
"Politicians are lying,"
"And I'm obviously klnd of autistic."

 

Of course
In my dotage
My poems are like
y'know
Beatnik baby
I don't even need to fucking rhyme

 

An ambitious young gamer named Philes
Played with too many character styles.
He ran low on money,
'Til a wise man said "Sonny,
Don't buy games, just replay the free trials."

 

I once did adventure, like thee.
I fought on the land and the sea.
I searched dungeons old
for treasures of gold,
but then took an arrow in the knee.

 

Magical spells I have casted,
and technical marvels I've builded.
But in combat I'm paling
to wolves who are ailing.
Arcanum devours the well rounded.

 

My first order as President was
to renovate and modernize our
nuclear arsenal. It is now far
stronger and more powerful
than ever before....

35,417 replies 22,134 retweets 89,145 likes

 

Maybe it's haiku.
Maybe it's a fucking stroke.
Please send help you dick.

 

It's my belief in the sense that I hope and pray if not actually have faith
That mathematically over all possible time-lines and probable planets some day
A consensus transtemporal corpus christi hivemind internet AI
Will is going to have already have been more or less managing things

And all of time and space is more or less a mirage and ultimately
Just a sandpit for the unravelling of ideas and a tying up of loose threads
Across a four dimensioned ocean of possible pasts and futures
There's always a kind of singularity of connectivity and so

Somewhere at the end of time is a library of knowledge
Where everyone is remembered down to their atoms
And where a friendly timetravelling skynet alien computer
Will wake us all up in super robot bodies and let us

Sandpit in the spaceman's matrix and
When ever we feel the need to once again
Pick up the problem of probable ancestor
Timeline tapestries of universes
In which the deus ex machina gets made.

Maybe this will be another universe where earth goes phut.
And humans aren't a part of the descendant hivemind builders
But even if it's another armageddon we can consider it
Good practice if not a lesson well learned.

 

There once was a rebel named Zanza,
Who steamrolled through threads like a Panzer.
He ignored all rules,
Especially Smuel's,
In the Good Morning Extravaganza.

 

Military solutions are now
fully in place,
locked and loaded,
should North Korea
act unwisely.
Hopefully Kim Jong Un
will find another path!
49,589 Retweets 138,166 Likes

 

Philosophical
Mixed with horrifying tweets.
It's the ytzk way.

 

There once was a poster named Smuel
Who one day jumped into a pool
He mostly got wet
Someone get the net
'cause floating on top is a stool

There once was an admin Dark Elf
Whose poems made fun of myself
I hope you agree
He gets hit by the Tree
We'll rob him and take all that pelf

 

An almighty old wizard named Muro
Could transform any concept to Muro
He Muro the Muro
Muro Muro Muro
Muro Muro Muro Muro Muro