Euphemisms

It's been scientifically proven that everyone looks more sexually appealing when you're inebriated.

One shirt in particular isn't lesbian related, though - the second one from the bottom before Wayne's shirt.

Unless it's for one of them new-fangled penis havin' lesbians.

 

You mean that "I need a girl who can handle my load" t-shirt? Oh yeah, you're right. I actually didn't noticed that it was altered...

Here is a possible replacement:

 

Yet another commercialized thing I haven't made money from. First, it was "1,000 ways to die"

Now it's a "I like my women" joke.

 

I like my women how I like your mom.

 

Destitute and in prison for committing a felony? Oh, wait, that's how I like my mom.