Contacting Tim Cain

Discussion in 'General Discussion' started by Spiffy, Sep 15, 2007.

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  1. Spiffy

    Spiffy Member

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    Spiffy, Sep 15, 2007
    Spiffy, Sep 15, 2007
    #1
    How can I do it?
     
    Spiffy, Sep 15, 2007
    Spiffy, Sep 15, 2007
    #1
  2. Dark Elf

    Dark Elf Administrator Staff Member

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    Dark Elf, Sep 15, 2007
    Dark Elf, Sep 15, 2007
    #2
    You need a piece of chalk, generous amounts of black velvet, scented candles (preferably black ones), incense, the Necronomicon, a finely ornate knife and a goat.
     
    Dark Elf, Sep 15, 2007
    Dark Elf, Sep 15, 2007
    #2
  3. Grossenschwamm

    Grossenschwamm Well-Known Member

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    Grossenschwamm, Sep 15, 2007
    Grossenschwamm, Sep 15, 2007
    #3
    You need some virgins, too...the goat will only get you so far.
     
    Grossenschwamm, Sep 15, 2007
    Grossenschwamm, Sep 15, 2007
    #3
  4. wobbler

    wobbler Well-Known Member

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    wobbler, Sep 15, 2007
    #4
    german Virgins that is.
     
    wobbler, Sep 15, 2007
    wobbler, Sep 15, 2007
    #4
  5. Xz

    Xz Monkey Admin Staff Member

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    Xz, Sep 15, 2007
    #5
    And don't forget to call the gods in the correct order when you invoke the circle.
     
    Xz, Sep 15, 2007
    Xz, Sep 15, 2007
    #5
  6. Grakelin

    Grakelin New Member

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    #6
    Final part of the ritual is to plunge the knife into your spleen as an offering.
     
    Grakelin, Sep 15, 2007
    Grakelin, Sep 15, 2007
    #6
  7. Frigo

    Frigo Active Member

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    #7
    No, no. Don't listen to Grakelin. You actually need to cut out the eyes of every one of your family members.
     
    Frigo, Sep 15, 2007
    Frigo, Sep 15, 2007
    #7
  8. Spiffy

    Spiffy Member

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    #8
    W...t...f???

    Can someone please be serious? -_-
     
    Spiffy, Sep 15, 2007
    Spiffy, Sep 15, 2007
    #8
  9. Dark Elf

    Dark Elf Administrator Staff Member

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    #9
    We are serious. Drop dead. Question is, are you?
     
    Dark Elf, Sep 15, 2007
    Dark Elf, Sep 15, 2007
    #9
  10. Spiffy

    Spiffy Member

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    #10
    Huh???
     
    Spiffy, Sep 15, 2007
    Spiffy, Sep 15, 2007
    #10
  11. Xz

    Xz Monkey Admin Staff Member

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    #11
    I assume you misread Dark Elf's post the same way I did. He meant we were drop-dead-serious, not that you should drop dead. Or I think so anyway.
     
    Xz, Sep 15, 2007
    Xz, Sep 15, 2007
    #11
  12. Spiffy

    Spiffy Member

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    #12
    All I'm asking is how can I contact Tim Cain!! And Dark Elve's response seemed a bit like a joke...
     
    Spiffy, Sep 15, 2007
    Spiffy, Sep 15, 2007
    #12
  13. Dark Elf

    Dark Elf Administrator Staff Member

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    Dark Elf, Sep 15, 2007
    #13
    Why do you assume that anyone of us would have the faintest idea of how to contact Tim Cain? We're a Troika fansite, we don't socialize with their founders.

    Also, have you ever considered the very strong possibility that mr Cain would dismiss your fantastic ideas as yet another pointless fanmail?

    Your reasons for contacting him, specifically?

    I know I should have hyphenated it.
     
    Dark Elf, Sep 15, 2007
    Dark Elf, Sep 15, 2007
    #13
  14. Spiffy

    Spiffy Member

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    #14
    Damnit, nevermind...
     
    Spiffy, Sep 15, 2007
    Spiffy, Sep 15, 2007
    #14
  15. Grakelin

    Grakelin New Member

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    #15
    I'd like to nominate this as the biggest PWN on this forum. The pure improvisational synchronization is perfect.
     
    Grakelin, Sep 15, 2007
    Grakelin, Sep 15, 2007
    #15
  16. wobbler

    wobbler Well-Known Member

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    wobbler, Sep 16, 2007
    wobbler, Sep 16, 2007
    #16
    Nah, we went to easy on him. We acutally ended up explaining the whole thing for him.
     
    wobbler, Sep 16, 2007
    wobbler, Sep 16, 2007
    #16
  17. Grakelin

    Grakelin New Member

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    Grakelin, Sep 16, 2007
    #17
    I assumed it was just patronizing, since you'd usually figure that after six people in a row tell you to perform an occult ritual to summon Tim Cain, there's a minimal chance of contacting Tim Cain.
     
    Grakelin, Sep 16, 2007
    Grakelin, Sep 16, 2007
    #17
  18. Spiffy

    Spiffy Member

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    Spiffy, Sep 16, 2007
    #18
    It must be possible...
     
    Spiffy, Sep 16, 2007
    Spiffy, Sep 16, 2007
    #18
  19. Telcontar

    Telcontar Well-Known Member

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    Telcontar, Sep 16, 2007
    Telcontar, Sep 16, 2007
    #19
    Oh Spiffy, you haven't heard? He died in a horrible car accident about a year ago....
     
    Telcontar, Sep 16, 2007
    Telcontar, Sep 16, 2007
    #19
  20. wobbler

    wobbler Well-Known Member

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    wobbler, Sep 16, 2007
    wobbler, Sep 16, 2007
    #20
    And would probaly be true.

    Therefor the ritual to contact him. You know, you just don't walk right in to the World of the Dead and say 'Hello'.
     
    wobbler, Sep 16, 2007
    wobbler, Sep 16, 2007
    #20
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