4 down, 8 to go

Discussion in 'General Discussion' started by Jungle Japes, Oct 2, 2011.

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  1. Xyle

    Xyle Member

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    I make a good straight man for your humor, don't I?
     
  2. wayne-scales

    wayne-scales Well-Known Member

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    I hope some guy smashes your skull in and eats your girlfriend's tits.
     
  3. wobbler

    wobbler Well-Known Member

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    Plus one.

    Though I think you should up your insults Wayne.

    I spit on those that say we are not animals.
     
  4. wayne-scales

    wayne-scales Well-Known Member

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    Wishing cancer on someone is a hard act to follow.
     
  5. wobbler

    wobbler Well-Known Member

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    Ah, you misunderstand me. It's not the harshness that give the insult quality, more often than not it lowers it.

    It's how much of what he has actually said and done that you have to work it. You have to insult him at the most basic of all levels, he should feel the insult in his souls.

    Your insults are just rude, nothing more. Only a brain dead moron who thinks he can read minds would be insulted by your saying. Ergo, I think you should up the quality of your insults.
     
  6. Arthgon

    Arthgon Well-Known Member

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    I still have the feeling that Xyle still tries to convince us that he is something special. Alas, he is not.
     
  7. wayne-scales

    wayne-scales Well-Known Member

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    Would you waste the minute brainpower it'd take to come up with a quality insult on him?
     
  8. wobbler

    wobbler Well-Known Member

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    But you are not me, you are you. I don't have the time to waste, but I figured you have. Or rather, I hoped you could take my place in the war of insults so I wouldn't have to jump in, but alas I might have been wrong.
     
  9. TheDavisChanger

    TheDavisChanger Well-Known Member

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    He has the quantity down, sure enough.
     
  10. Smuelissim0

    Smuelissim0 New Member

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    I'll do one:

    I wish that one day Xyle is driving in a car with his girlfriend, in which the air conditioning is broken and the windows won't wind down for some reason. Suddenly, Xyle does a really big fart - a powerful, multiple-gust monster that's been brewing in his colon for a while. The pungent smell hangs in the air - a stench of broccoli and decaying meat, mixed with foul month-old cheese. The odors waft through the car, assaulting the occupants' nostrils, like a punch in the face that lasts for several minutes. Xyle considers apologizing, but suspects that if he opens his mouth he will vomit, so he tries to mind-speak his apology instead. At the next red light, his girlfriend opens her door, takes a deep breath of outside air, then turns back to Xyle and says "I'm leaving you". They sit in silence for the rest of the trip, wallowing in the remnants of Xyle's ass-fumes. From that day, whenever Xyle hears a fart, he will remember his lost love, and when he is an old man, sitting alone on his porch, small children will taunt him by blowing raspberries, as he quietly weeps.
     
  11. Arthgon

    Arthgon Well-Known Member

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    I wish that one day he accidentally mind-rape his girlfriend until her head explode.
     
  12. Jojobobo

    Jojobobo Well-Known Member

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    Seeing as Xyle typically has an answer for everything, I bet he'll say "Actually my girlfriend likes farts, even really smelly ones. I fart in her face most nights" or maybe "Well God designed us this way, so if I did a fart that smelly I'm sure my girlfriend would appreciate that it was part of God's greater plan for me to do that fart and so therefore she'd forgive me". If not one of these, then it'll be something similar involving physics.
     
  13. Xyle

    Xyle Member

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    How about a simple answer? It's too hilarious to be insulting.* Completely unreal: The appropriate response of the gf would be to demand that the bf pull over the car so that she could open the door and breathe. And the appropriate loving bf response would be to do so.

    Truth hurts: You REALLY want to insult someone so that they have absolutely no defenses against it? Use the truth. The closer to the mark an insult is to how a person feels, or the closer to the mark to a truth that a person is wishing wasn't so, the more devasting the insult.

    But you also have to not care. Otherwise it's "Tough Love". And, I suppose, that is why others are insulted when they hear the truth from a stranger: They don't believe the speaker cares. (or, I suppose, they don't care about the stranger -- same thing really.)

    And here I thought that the degrading value of the insults on this forum was a result of a gradual acceptance of me being here. I suppose that it still possible that the acceptance of my existance is more subconscious than conscious. Either that or to actually create an insult that hits the mark requires that you actually care (one way or the other) and your all's struggles to not care is the cause of the degrading of the insults by blocking that which would make you guys care.

    So in conclusion, to create the worse insults: 1) Use Truth and 2) Care enough to really Hate the person. And I mean Hate, not dislike or put off by the person. Hate so strong that it destroys you: The best weapons of the heart are double-edged (i.e. deals damage to both the wielder and the target).

    Of course, if you do use Truth, and I value Truth, then in the same moment that you deliver the most devasting insult possible, you provide me with something I that value: the Light of Truth. Darkness has no power over The Light.

    But then, the most insidious Lies are 99.9% Truth. That way the listener accepts the lie as part of the truth that the listener believes. So to truly insult someone that walks in the light, you have also have to remove them from the light with a deception that makes them vulnerable to the insult.
    This is the power of cults: they demand obedience to a "truth" that is actually a lie that both insults and demeans. Which is the lie is so obvious to those outside the cult. And why the world hates this form of lie. Lies and self-deceptions are not so supposed to be obvious.

    So there is no real workable solution. Either the insult has no power, aids the person, or is obvious to those outside of the situation. Of course, if you expand the situation so that the whole world is a part of it....

    * The simple answer ended at the above "*".
     
  14. Jojobobo

    Jojobobo Well-Known Member

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  15. wayne-scales

    wayne-scales Well-Known Member

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    I suppose If he's sticking around, we'll have to Learn to put Up With his crazy, Rambling, semi-Incoherent noNsense.
     
  16. TheDavisChanger

    TheDavisChanger Well-Known Member

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    Hold on, I'm decoding wayne-scales' random capitalization for a secret message...
    I - L - U - W - R - I - N

    I think...I think it's a surrender: I Lose U WIN (the R is silent).
    That's great, but what does it mean?
     
  17. magikot

    magikot Well-Known Member

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    It means that we all wish Charles would come back for a few weeks. I want to see the debates he and xyle would get into.
     
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