Woohoo! I have a free prize waiting!!

Not only do I do that, but I also press every button marked "OK"!

- Zen

 

Nah. Banners and pop-ups are there to be killed and ignored.

They lost my custom when they invented marketing spam. If they'd not done that, I'd be completely happy to follow banners that interested me. Now, they could advertise free money and I'd just ignore it the same as the rest.

 

i hate these pop-ups!
they know that people wont read them!
but they still have to make 'em

 

No, I never ever click on banners or pop-up ads. Why? Because advertising simply doesn't work on me.

I would have bought all those amazing X10 Cameras (!!!!) whether I had seen the pop-up ads or not. When I go to the zoo and punch monkies in the face, it has nothing at all to do with ad banners.

 

it was YOU ?!

 

No. No it wasn't me. It wasn't my fault.

IT WAS THE MONKEYS. TH-TH-THE MMMMONNKEEEEEEYS! AIEEE!!! DALE ES TU QUERPO ALEGRIA MACARENA!

The monkeys whisper to me, and everyone around pretends like they can't hear them. It's all a conspiracy to make me believe that I'm crazy.

"Punch me in the face, Milho! Win a prize! C'mon, Milho, do it! Punch me in the face!"

"No no no no no no no, stop calling me a ho, you're not my uncle," I mutter to myself. People look at me and hold their children close as though I'm the one they should be afraid of. They know they can hear the monkeys too, they're just acting like they don't to fuck with my head.

And when I refuse (loudly) to not "punch them in the face, NOT THIS TIME!" the monkeys get all riled up and start throwing their doodoo at me.

"OOOK! EEEEK! HEYYYYY MACARENA! AIEEE!" they screech.

So then I punch them in the face to make them stop, and also so that I can win the prize. Then the men with sticks come and make me leave. They tell me the prize is inside the padded van, and I need to get inside all peaceful like in order to claim it. Then they mutter something about "... why is it that retards always end up at the zoo?..." as they slam the door.

Apparently, the prize is a free stay at the all-white hotel. They have good jello. It is green flavored.

 

*INSIDE MILO'S HEAD*

Milo drives his beat-up little Honda Civic around the parking lot of the mall. It's Saturday, about 5:30, and all the parking spots are filled.
One car is remarkable; a huge, black limousine occupying the two handicapped spaces in front of Morrison's cafeteria.
Milo drives to the rear of the complex and parks at the service entrance to Morrison's. He removes a small handgun and a nylon stocking from the glove-box, walks to the service entrance, and puts the stocking over his head. He tries the door, but it's locked. Milo holds the gun before him, preparing to shoot off the lock.

*MILO WAKES UP IN A PADDED ROOM*

Next installment: Milo gets a little closer to the Jell-o

 

Hey I resent that! I only buy American cars. I drive a '73 Ford Hoopteeâ„¢. Other than that, it's pretty much spot on.

BTW, good to have you back Feldon. Check your Private Messages.

 

*INSIDE MILO'S HEAD*

Suddenly, the door bursts open, and out runs a beautiful young woman. She looks around wildly, not noticing Milo behind the door whipping off the stocking and hiding the gun in his jacket.
She runs to Milo's Hooptie-mobile, frantically opens the door, leaps into the back seat, locks the door, and cowers.
A moment later, an elegant man and woman, in tuxedo and evening dress, come out of the service entrance and look around. The man notices Milo.

*MILO WAKES UP IN A PADDED ROOM*

Next installment: Milo gets even closer to the Jello-O.

 

Milo, if you're looking for some monkeys to punch, check out this Basement Jaxx video page and watch the one called "Where's Your Head At?" You have to watch the whole vid to get the full effect of exactly how much monkey punching would help the guy.

If the music bugs you, just mute the vid while you watch it.

 

sherrif that's been playing here in oz for a few months now and it's a great filmclip ain't it?.... ones of the better ones around right now actually

 

I couldn't get the video to work. :sad:

 

Hmm ... you're on DSL with Real Player installed, right? If so, I don't know why it wouldn't work. Search it out on WinMX or something. It's really worth it. I think it is literally the scariest music vid ever made.

Those damn monkeys give me the creeps!

[EDIT] Here's another link to it (still Real format) that might work

<font size=-1>[ This Message was edited by: Sheriff Fatman on 2002-02-12 22:08 ]</font>

 

Ah, that must be the problem. Ad-Aware killed Real Player on my comp.

If only all these major sites (amazon.com, etc.) used some other format besides *.rm...

 

I would love to see these. Especially the Rendez-vous by Jax. It's so funny. But I don't use RealPlayer. It's goddamn spyware.

 

Don't worry, it's a shitty video anyways... I seen it a buncha times when I was in Finland... it's AWEFUL, and the music is just AWEFULLER!!! And that Fat Man there is disgusting.

 

Yeah, they did try to pull a fast one a while back, but I did some checking and they don't spy as long as you set it up right.

Milo, I've got Real Player installed, ran adware (full scan) and it didn't even squeak about Real Player or Jukebox. You gotta see this vid, man, it's cool. I dunno how you'd feel about the music (it's just dance pop kinda stuff) but the vid is the dog's bollocks.

 

Well, all I know is that I ran ad-aware and killed all my spyware.

Then I tried to play an *.rm file and (my previously working) Real Time gave me a little message that "A component necessary for the operation of RealPlayerâ„¢ has been removed. This application will be closed." Or something like that.

Oh well. I'll try to find the video on some other format. I don't know why people only offer their content in shitty formats like *.rm anyway...

 

And then....uh I forgot what this thread was about...