Sorry to tread on news territory again, but... I got your 111-inch ball of paint RIGHT HERE! Booyaw! Big ball of paint ALEXANDRIA, Indiana (AP) -- A man who's spent years applying layers of paint to a baseball that's grown to enormous proportions is hoping to have it declared the world's largest ball of paint. For the past 27 years, Mike Carmichael has been painting a baseball that hangs in a shed behind his home. It now weighs 1,300 pounds, is more than 35 inches in diameter and has a 111-inch circumference due to more than 18,000 layers of paint. On Saturday, Carmichael watched as a crew took a core sample from the green ball that's needed before it can earn a spot in the Guinness Book of Records. In honor of Carmichael's work, Saturday was declared Ball of Paint Day in Alexandria, about 25 miles northeast of Indianapolis. It starting with a proclamation honoring Carmichael on the steps of City Hall, followed by a photo exhibit and ending with the core sample taken at Carmichael's home. "I am not going to start any more baseballs," Carmichael declared.
Yeah, that one sure gave me a good laugh. It's always amusing to see what people like to do on their spare time. Hell, 1300 pounds... that's an awful fucking lot of paint. You're not quite as fast at bringing up stuff like this as I am though.
I'm going to kill people. Stupid people. Stupid people who make giant balls of paint. Then I'm going to laugh like Charlton Heston in Planet of the Apes. Where you hear me guffaw like a fat little piggy but my mouth hardly moves and the camera pans upwards into the sky.
This just in! Baseball painting declared to be biggest waste of time in the Guinness Book of World Records!
I don't know. Have you ever looked at the book? I think fingernail growing and longest time spent lying down on a bed of nails are pretty useless as well.
[troll]Aren't both of those records held by Hindus? Theres something wrong with that religion.[/troll] Anyway, for ball of paint day I'm going huff some spray paint and lie on my bed balled up in a fetal position crying.
Maybe you could do that, on a bed of nails, and wait for your fingernails to grow really long as well.
I think you've already got it if you're sniffing paint while lying on a bed of nails, so I wouldn't worry if I were you. Just do it.